I had people dive over tables and start strangling me.
And every time they'd walk in the classroom, I would go, "Franken Berry! I said it every day when they came in the classroom, until one day Franken Berry punched me in the face.
I'd give them a hard time, and when it drove them crazy, that was funny to me.
And I came upon a few sentences that gave me pause. Here's the quote: "Cocaine was piled high on the bar like little ski slopes.
ES: So I was flipping through your book recently, The Making of a Stand-Up Guy. ES: You're writing about hanging out with Eddie in the '80s, right around the time his career blew up.
Universe I want to see him pose with keloids on his chest."ES: Keloids as in scars? "See how many shows you do after I carve your chest up. You may star in the next horror flick, but that's about it."ES: Did he respond?
ES: Not so scared that you didn't threaten to disfigure him. And, of course, people were having sex everywhere, constantly." Is that hyperbole? ES: There was constant public sex happening all around you?
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Most of the people tuning in to Wednesday night's Spike TV tribute Eddie Murphy: One Night Only will do so to see the headliner. They'll say the most vile thing they can think of about a person's mom. ES: You've said that, growing up with Eddie, he used to get so upset by your teasing that he'd go after you with a knife. Eddie is the one who stars in family-friendly movies and reneged on hosting the Oscars, but Charlie is the renegade who still does stand-up tours and, if his "True Hollywood Stories" segments on Chappelle's Show are to be believed, once kicked Rick James's ass. Eddie is the comic your parents like, and Charlie is the one who might cut you. I guess I was expecting something with a little more bite. Remember when [Don] Imus made his gaffe on the radio, and the whole country went nuts? It's not like it used to be, where you could say whatever you wanted. It was the same joke he'd been making in his stand-up act, which he told all over the country, and everyone laughed. CM: I forget the exacting wording, but something about those girls not being hos, but definitely nappy-headed. He had the United Black Ministers Union or whatever saying they wanted Hughley run out of show business. As I learned when I called Charlie recently to talk about his brother's tribute, his reputation as the Murphy family badass is not undeserved, extending to his use of marijuana before interviews.