His analysis and advice, however, has been more harmful than helpful.
Harris fails to understand the relationship culture he critiques.
It would be easy to dismiss Harris’s fretting as merely advice that preteens, teenagers, or immature people should avoid dating until they mature.
But his writings do not support this interpretation.
Over the last 20 years, Harris has moved away from home, gotten married, had kids, and, finally, enrolled in a formal school setting. In an interview with NPR this July, Harris explains that a wake of personal testimonies about his books has caused him to reevaluate his argument and its influence.
His Twitter feed includes several apologies to those wronged by his teachings.
My blog pages elaborate on this and asks if “kissing dating goodbye” is appropriate for all ages.
Temporarily “kissing dating goodbye” which could also be called postponing dating might be appropriate especially for younger teenagers.Harris emphasizes that the problem of dating is not solved by “dating right.” In “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” Harris reiterates that dating itself is “an approach to relationships that wants to go in a different direction than the one God has for us.” Nor can Christians redeem the process: “the boyfriend/girlfriend exclusiveness of the dating system is based on a self-seeking, pleasure-seeking attitude toward relationships,” Harris warns in “Dating Problems.” Far from trying to rescue dating from our human selfishness, Harris advocates courtship as promoting the right attitude and approach to relationships.In Harris’s view, the arc of a godly romantic relationship progresses from friendship, to courtship, then engagement, and, finally, marriage.Here are the topics that I have written about so far: What Problems Joshua Harris Acknowledged About How Singles Relate At His Church (But Doesn’t Share on His Website) NEW ENTRY 4/30/08 Starting My Blog: Should I Kiss Dating Goodbye or Kiss That Book Goodbye? Examples of Foolishness That Can Happen With “Kissing Dating Goodbye” NEW ENTRY 4/18/08 Josh Harris’s Shopping Cart Illustration: Josh Harris’s “Updated” View on Courtship/Groups Josh Harris’s View On People Using His Book Legalistically Another Look at Joshua Harris’s “Updated” Views on Kissing Dating Goodbye What Problems Joshua Harris Acknowledged About How Singles Relate At His Church (But Doesn’t Share on His Website) NEW ENTRY 4/30/08 What Another Leader In Sovereign Grace Ministries Teaches About Courtship & Dating: Brett Detwiler A Response to Josh Harris’s 7 “Defects” to Dating Courtship: Extending Parents “Protection” Beyond Home Schooling? Definition of Terms: Dating, Groups & Courtship What Is “Dating” And What Did Harris Supposedly “Kiss Goodbye? Harris’s influence expanded thanks to that book, his first.