The concept of a black man in a relationship with a white woman is a "thing" that people have an opinion on, and that opinion comes with an entire set of stereotypes, fueled by racist ideology, a complicated past, and sometimes even pop culture.Kanye West once rapped about how successful black men will "leave your ass for a white girl," and then put himself into that box by marrying a white woman, furthering the pervasiveness of flawed, generic ideas about interracial relationships.
The story of Till's murder didn't scare me as much as it made me want to piss off racist fucks even more. I don't say that as some guilt-ridden rationalization for dating white women. Before I was even 10, I started having crushes on girls, trying to get my first kiss, and all of that. I thought this girl was hot because of her freckles and I thought that girl was hot because of her soft hair or whatever and I just wasn't in fifth grade thinking about the racial ramifications of features that I found attractive. I was consuming all of this media and I could just sense from the adults around me that, as a black person, when I was watching , it was expected that I be more attracted to the girls in Destiny's Child than Britney Spears.
By middle school, and especially high school, those expectations were even more apparent.
Twenty-two-year-old virgin psychopath Elliot Rodger just killed six people in California and left behind a paper trial of racially charged sentiments like, "How could an inferior, ugly black boy be able to get a white girl and not me? White reaction to The Verdict may have been one of shock and rage, but it's also largely oblivious to the history of disenfranchisement, partially as it relates to interracial relationships, of blacks in this country.
" The most visible criminal trial of the 20th century centered around a blonde white woman who was presumably murdered at the hands of her black husband, O. Part of the reason why black people celebrated the O. verdict is because it was a rare example of a black man finally beating the system that was so unjust to his people for so long. Throughout this nation's history, unfathomable numbers of innocent black men have been hung from trees and burned because of often fabricated stories of their fraternizing with white women, and there were usually no consequences for the white men lynching them.
A racist jury acquitted his murderers, Roy Bryant and J. Milam, despite overwhelming evidence, and, to rub salt in the wound, both admitted to killing Till in magazine the next year. The shoe was on the other foot for once and so be it if two white people wound up dead. That's harsh, but that's the historical context of black men dating white women that I unfortunately have to consider when doing the same. Even then, I understood that it was racial, but there was a disconnection from my personal reality. Whatever I learned from the trial was tucked away as something that I should know as a black man, but it didn't have a life-altering impact on my own development. For whatever implications the trial had, that shit also had nothing to do with me. My attraction to them was likely a natural response to my environment. Nobody was trying to assimilate with white people, but sometimes that's just the way things go when you want a better home and better schools for your family.
Though those events are something of which I'm always cognizant, I didn't adhere to them as any sort of cautionary tale. The idea was always to live my life however I wanted to live it. But it does have an unforeseen effect on your outlook when you're one of the few black families in town.
Black women have told me it's because I'm a sellout.
The white men who can get past the mental anguish of my black penis tarnishing "their" women think I'm making some latent admission that their race has the most attractive women.
I started to see what it really meant to be in an interracial relationship.